Make Yourself Vast Enough to Hold the Smallness of the World with Love

She looked at me—her eyes scanning, 
assessing—and in an instant, I felt it: 
the sting of judgment. 

A subtle tightening in my chest. 
A heat rising. 
Annoyance. 

I could feel it beginning to take hold. 
I was familiar with the taste.
Not just metallic—
but like scorched air on a parched tongue,
the taste of dryness turning bitter,
like something singed and left unsaid.
It clung to the roof of my mouth,
a residue of heat and silence,
the aftertaste of being stripped bare
under someone else’s stare.

I knew this was not mine to carry.
I had made a promise to myself: 
not to let small disturbances 
grow roots inside me. 

So I paused. 
I breathed. 
I expanded. 
Not just in breath, but in presence. 
I made myself bigger than the annoyance— 
wider than the gaze that 'tried' to shrink me.

I saw the annoyance as a small sphere 
hovering in front of me. 
I surrounded it with a soft light—
an offering of love, 
not resistance. 
I did not try to fix it or fight it. 
I simply observed.

And in that observation, 
something shifted.
The sphere dissolved—
into a thousand tiny droplets. 
They scattered down my forearm, 
between wrist and elbow. 
And then, in one 
gentle sweep of attention, 
I washed them away. 
From top to bottom. 
Out and through.
Gone.

Not buried. Not bypassed. 
But witnessed, transmuted, released.

The alchemy of awareness: 
the ability to hold a charged moment 
without being consumed by it.
As leaders, we are not immune 
to judgment or reaction. 
But we can choose how we meet it. 
We can become spacious enough 
to hold discomfort 
without collapsing into it.

Annoyance, like any emotion, 
carries energy. 
And energy, when met with love, 
can become something else— 
an opening, 
a clearing, 
a subtle act of liberation.

Let this be a wellspell for the day: Make yourself vast enough to hold the smallness of the world with love.

Leadership Apothecary Practice: Make Yourself Bigger

Use this 3-minute ritual the next time a small irritation arises—a comment, a glance, a judgment that catches you.

1. Pause and Breathe: Inhale slowly. Exhale fully. Feel your feet on the ground. Let your breath deepen. Begin to sense the boundaries of your body—then expand beyond them. Grow your awareness outward. Imagine yourself getting bigger—wider than the moment, more spacious than the reaction.

2. Name and Externalize: Gently name the feeling (e.g., annoyance, judgment). Rather than holding it inside, imagine it as a small sphere or shape in front of you—separate from who you are.

3. Surround with Light: Now surround the sphere with soft light—your presence, your love. No fixing, no flinching. Just witnessing. Let it float in your now-expanded space, cradled but not consuming.

4. Dissolve and Wash: See the emotion soften and dissolve—breaking into tiny droplets. Sense them resting somewhere in your body (perhaps your arm, your chest). Gently sweep them away with your attention—from top to bottom— like water running through you, rinsing the moment clean.